Monday, December 3, 2007

Plague of the Parachute



Friday I taught P.E. to 5 first grade classes. We were doing parachute "fitness" which involves laying in push-up position while shaking the parachute with one hand, skipping around in a huge circle while holding on to the parachute (which totally reminded me of pony rides at Dad's old Loral parties - except in this case, the kids were like the ponies forced to circle round even when they didn't want to, or the chute was running away with them), and other such "fun" activities. At the end of the fitness we played shark attack.

In shark attack, everyone sits with their legs under the parachute and shakes it like the ocean while two student sharks go underneath and slither around trying to pull people into the water by their legs. There are also lifeguards who walk around looking for screaming, and let me emphasize, screaming people to save. (It's basically human tug of war.)

Everyone loves this game but it is extremely loud. When almost everyone is under the chute, I blow the whistle and everyone come out. During the 5th class, I blew my whistle and everyone started to emerge. Then I heard some whimpers and looked across the chute to see a small blonde boy jittering around in his underwear! Those were really some wild sharks!

I ran over as quick as I could and told everyone to hold the parachute on the floor while I made him go back under and put his pants on. He seemed to recover fine emotionally, but as they were lining up for drinks I noticed his pants were on backwards.

Moral of the story: Although zipper and button jeans may be more difficult for children to use in the bathroom, they may just be the thing that saves them from an embarrassing shark attack.

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